Another Heartache...

Barely two weeks when my dad returned to His Creator, we were again left with another heartache with the sudden demise of my aunt/godmother/ninang Mally.

Got a call from my sis and the first thing she asked was if I were in a good place, if I were sitting down...and I said, why ask me such questions...I was already running a lot of scenarios in my head as to what she will be telling me...and then she broke the news, my Ninang Mally was gone....

At first, I thought it was a dream, that I was in a dream...that maybe I heard it wrong. After the phone call, I called her again to confirm and reconfirm and reconfirm...and however I try not to believe what I heard, it was true. I was in a state of shock. I didn't know what to do, what to think...It just wouldn't sink in. 

It was another sleepless night for me, it was again a Wednesday...was it a coincidence that Dad and Ninang both left this world on a Wednesday. What does it mean? Why? Why? Why?

I kept asking WHY? 

But who am I to ask the Lord. 

Only He knows when is the time for us to part this world.

Only He knows what the future has for us.

Only He knows why.

All I could do was pray and pray hard. 

Pray for strength and understanding.

Pray to the Lord that He increases our faith in this trying times.

It was painful for me. My Ninang was like my second mom. We both celebrate the same birthday. September 15. She would always remind me that I was born while she was celebrating her 18th birthday and that my mom wasn't able to cook pancit for her. This year, she was 53 and I turned 35. We would always exchange greetings and wishes.

I miss her. 

I will miss her.  

I know she will be watching over us just like my dad is now.

I was also thinking of my mom. I know this is really painful for her. She was just starting to recover from the heartache of losing our dad and now, she lost her sister. I wouldn't know how to comfort her, to reassure her that all will be well. 

Life is indeed a mystery. You will never know when or how you will depart this world.

I even have to ask myself if I am ready to leave this world should the Lord calls on me to depart it. 

While at mass yesterday, during the Homily...the priest words struck me...

He said...

" If you die, did the world become a better place because you lived?..."

Indeed...something to ponder upon...